ITS OBVIOUS, MY DEAR WATSON!
Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson decided to go camping for the weekend. In the late evening after having dined on a meal of freshly caught trout, they decided to call it a night, and crawled into their small, 2-man tent. Soon both of them were fast asleep, and Watson was snoring away. Almost 2 hours later, Holmes woke up to complete silence and deduced that his old friend was awake because he heard no snoring sounds.
Holmes asks Watson, “Are you awake, Watson?”
And Watson replies. “Wide Awake, Mr. Holmes.”
Holmes: “With your keen observational skills, look up, and tell me what you see.”
Watson: “I see a large full moon, and a brilliant night sky full of stars including the Milky Way, the Dig Dipper, and the constellation Orion.
Holmes: And what does that tell you, my dear Watson?
Watson: That our sun is one of billions and billions of stars in the universe, and that by the position of the moon it is approximately 1:35 a.m.
Holmes: And is that all, Watson?
Watson: Since we can see the moon we can deduce that by the absence of clouds, that tomorrow will be a bright, sunny day. So what do you see, Mr. Holmes?
Holmes: Its quite obvious, Dr. Watson – Someone has stolen our tent!
Rules for Dogs!
I must always shake the water out of my fur before I enter the house.
I will not roll on dead fish, crabs, or seagulls when I go to the beach.
I will not eat the cats' food, before or after they eat it.
I will not take my Mom's bra or underwear and run around the neighborhood with it trying to play tug-a-war with the neighbors.
Garbage cans are not delicatessens for dogs.
I will not chase kitties with black and white stripes that smell funny.
I will not lick my human's face after eating animal poop.
The garbage man is not a burglar who is stealing our stuff.
I will not wake up Mommy by sticking my cold, wet nose up her rear end.
I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when he's on the toilet.
I will not leave dirty nose prints on or try to lick the backyard glass door after Mommy has just cleaned it!
When I eat grass and am about to throw up, I will stop trying to find the last areas of clean carpet in the house.
I will not throw up in the car when we go for rides in the country!
I will not shred the telephone book or toilet tissue into a million pieces when my parents leave me home alone for more than 2 hours.
I will not jump into my parent’s brand new 2014 Dodge Ram and shake after playing in the mud.
I must never drink out of the toilet, because it was intended for an entirely different use!
I promise never to play keep-a-way with my owner’s car keys when they are running late for work.